In This Forever
by greysislove21
Summary: MerDer oneshot in season 5. Whenever we seem to get on track, we always fall apart.


**Hi everyone! Just another quick MerDer oneshot set in season five. Hope you like it! :)**

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Whenever we seemed to be back on track, we always fall apart. That was the constant thought running my head as I was sitting in my car in the middle of nowhere to get my boyfriend to realize that he wasn't a murderer. Things were going so great until that stupid serial killer needed to make an appearance in the hospital and stick crazy thoughts into Derek's head about them being exactly alike. They would never be remotely alike. And then it just had to be the next week when he made a stupid mistake that killed a woman and her baby. Then, he had to find out that Mark was dating Lexie, starting the fist fight of the century. Then, he had to go to the hospital, clearly still hung over, to find out that he lost more people than he saved. I know he's just too stubborn to recognize that he takes on the most impossible cases and gives people hope. And I can't help but feel a little guilty to know that the clinical trial is where he got a bulk of those deaths and that I was the one who forced him to do it. And now, I'm sitting in my car in the middle of nowhere, like I said before, because my brainless and extremely drunk boyfriend just batted my engagement ring out into the woods. Could life get any better?

These incidents couldn't have found worse timing either. We were finally starting to resemble a normal, functioning relationship. He was ready to take the next step and propose, and to my surprise, when I found out, I couldn't contain my excitement. Because when it comes down to it, I am completely and totally in love with Derek Shepherd so much that it's pathetic. Always have been, and always will be. And the fact that he actually wanted to stick by me and make as serious of a commitment to be by my side for the rest of my life made me really freaking happy. Because I love him.

That's why I'm sitting in my car in the middle of nowhere, hoping that he'll eventually realize that I'm still here, that I'm not giving up, and that I want a forever. I know that he's probably really drunk and angrier at the world than he's ever been before, but I'm staying because I want to be the one constant in his life. No matter what goes wrong, I want him to always be sure that I'll be there supporting him because I could only hope that he would do the same.

The fact that I was so dependent on him makes me scared. It always has, and probably always will. But right now, I love him too much to care. Even though my head will constantly be telling me to run, my heart had to be strong enough to suppress these thoughts. And by staying here tonight, this was my graduation, or whatever.

Since his rant about how I never would want to be committed, I have been waiting and staring at the trailer for any signs of movement for about two hours now. Once he's sober, he won't think I'll ever forgive him for the nasty things he said to me, but in my head, I honestly couldn't find any reason to be mad at him. He was drunk and mad. When people are angry, we usually take it out on the people we love the most because we know that they'll stay standing by our side.

Finally, I spotted a sole light brighten the trailer. I saw the curtain on the window open just a crack before Derek pulled it all the way open to see if he wasn't hallucinating. I gave him a quick wave and warm smile before I could tell he was running to the door. I figured I'd meet him halfway because with how much he had been drinking, there was a very high chance that he would stumble or trip on something on the way to my car.

I casually walked over to the trailer porch, and I could sense the relief he felt. And even though deep down, I knew that he knew that I would stay, I loved to prove him wrong.

"Meredith?" His voice was so broken, so hurt. I had never seen him so vulnerable before.

"Hey."

"You stayed?"

"I told you I wasn't going to run."

"But the things I said – "

"Were terrible and hurtful, but I'm in this forever."

"I'm sorry."

"I know. We'll talk about it in the morning, when you're sober. You have a lot of apologizing to do. But for now, let's just go to sleep."

"Ok."

We made our way into the trailer silently, and Derek grabbed me a pair of his sweats and one of his t-shirts to wear to bed.

Before we called it a night, he slurred something, "I still wanna get married."

"Me too." I smiled.

As we laid there in the peaceful silence of the night, I couldn't help but think that this was the one place I belonged – in his arms.

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